Mindful Masculinity

Disclaimer: I am not a dating coach nor am I selling any dating products or services this blog is really for recreational usage to reflect on my previous experiences in daygame and to share my insight. For those who want to network in the future please email: jeremysergent361@gmail.com thanks – Article Written by Jeremy Sergent

Sasha Daygame, aka Alex Lasarev, wrote The Direct Daygame Bible in 2015. A three-time speaker at the 21 Convention, host of the Direct Daygame Summit, and an early collaborator with James Marshall of The Natural Lifestyles, Alex Lasarev built a fairly profound legacy. He amassed millions of views on YouTube through his infields and content, gained over 100,000 subscribers, and mentored several other dating coaches, most notably Ryan Black. Sasha has done it all. He was also mentioned several times in Nick Krauser’s books as one of the key pioneers of the London Daygame model, while collaborating with many high-profile coaches, including Anthony Dream Johnson, James Marshall, Liam McRae, Yad, Alan Roger Currie, and Marcus Oakley.

But where do Sasha’s weaknesses really lie?

For starters, he is the quintessential “spiritual PUA.” In my experience, many PUAs who drift heavily into spirituality end up living somewhat odd lives. I’ve always seen spirituality, in this context, as a coping mechanism used to justify failures or move away from objective reality. Sasha is now in his forties, childless, and living what appears to be a fairly mundane life centred around spirituality and self-help rhetoric. Personally, I would not want that outcome for myself. This is also how Roosh V ended up when his pickup career ended- dedicating himself to God after a pretty successful pickup career.

Sasha had a traumatic childhood and, before becoming a dating coach and getting into pickup, seemingly tried to impress ex-girlfriends by buying them extravagant gifts — including a sports car for a stripper ex-girlfriend. This lack of common sense is fairly common among people before they begin their PUA journey, but Sasha’s lows seem lower than most dating coaches’. He reportedly had an abusive, unloving mother and a childhood filled with bullying. We’ve heard similar stories from coaches such as John Anthony and James McLean, whose poor parental relationships seemingly inspired their move into dating coaching or their lack of “feminine love” from their childhood serving as motivation to get into pickup.

Sasha also appears to lack some common sense in the way he dresses . Despite being a dating coach for nearly a decade, he remains poorly dressed, which I genuinely do not understand. How can you coach men on dating while presenting yourself that way in your forties? You are leading by example, and your example matters. Of course, Sasha prides himself on authenticity, but I personally don’t buy the argument. Dressing poorly does not make you authentic; it simply makes you look like a immature idiot and dressing like that in your mid forties is just tragic in my opinion. I can’t think of what’s worse Sasha Daygame’s man bun and ace of spades t-shirt combo or ice whites blue jeans , white shirt and ridiculously gay sunglasses.

It’s interesting that, in reviews of Sasha’s comedy shows at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, critics often mention his tendency toward incomplete stories and disorganised sketches. That same incompleteness and misdirection appear in the infield reports throughout this book. The writing feels half-finished and lacking in depth. There’s no detailed storytelling like you get in Balls Deep or A Natural History. Instead, the reports are sparse, cold, and even more detached than Tom Torero’s style.

For someone so focused on spirituality and connection, Sasha strangely fails to go deep into his own experiences. He briefly mentions a few “inner game” thoughts and moves on, leaving little substance behind. It’s disappointing that someone with over a decade of dating experience would produce something that feels so underdeveloped. Nick Krauser was coaching for a similar length of time and he produced 7 books – Sasha can barely muster 100 pages crammed with testimonials – all in all a pretty weak effort.

Sasha claims that “an ideal woman shouldn’t be materialistic.” The problem is that many women are materialistic to some degree, and that is part of human mating strategy. Money matters in dating because it provides safety, stability, and long-term security. Women from places like Eastern Europe and Asia often place strong value on status and financial stability. In China, for example, public dating markets often emphasise annual income over physical appearance.

I dislike when dating coaches downplay the importance of money. Money is important to many people, and that is not inherently bad. Life is, to some extent, a class struggle, and financial success can make dating significantly easier and more comfortable. Sasha doesn’t seem to offer a particularly balanced perspective on female attraction or long-term relationship dynamics. If a young woman wants children, financial stability, and a secure future, why wouldn’t she prioritise money and status? It’s unrealistic to pretend these factors don’t matter or simply to call women prozis because they don’t have the same opinions on finances as sex deranged puas do.

Sasha also says that “women are bored” and lack “value-givers.” To some extent, that may be true, but women in the West are absolutely flooded with options through apps like Tinder and platforms like Instagram. Most of my female friends in the developed world were not “bored” with dating; they were overwhelmed with choice. Ironically, Sasha later claims women are too busy, which somewhat contradicts his earlier point.

His advice on curiosity and genuine interest, however, is genuinely strong. My current girlfriend once told me she agreed to date me because I was the first man who approached her while sincerely caring about what she had to say. On this point, I completely agree with Sasha. Connection matters deeply, and this idea has also been emphasised heavily in James Marshall’s teachings.

Sasha’s advice for stopping women in direct daygame resembles Yad’s aggressive “stop right in front of her” approach. Personally, I think this can work on more confident or conservative women, particularly from places like Russia, where strong masculine intent may be respected. I’ve even been criticised before by a Lithuanian girl for being too “beta” in my approach, so I understand the logic. However, on shyer women, this style can easily become overwhelming.

Sasha also advises readers not to become “routine monkeys,” and I largely agree. While routines can provide structure and guidance — especially for beginners — they can also come across as robotic and inauthentic. I’ve seen men achieve success through the London Daygame model, but I’ve also seen it make some people seem incapable of thinking for themselves copying the same lines “i just saw you and think you look nice” ” my mum warned me about French girls” its all the same shit being said by the same daygamers I even had one woman complain that I sent the same opening text as another daygamer who opened here. There is definitely a sense of unoriginality that comes with these models and sometimes that can really be blatant.

Toward the end of the book, Sasha gives some genuinely good advice on different types of women and the strategies needed to attract them. He discusses religious women, shy women, and highly egotistical “Instagram model” types. I largely agree with his observations here, having personally struggled with religious women and highly status-conscious women myself.

However, Sasha also argues that certain socities brainwashes women into believing sex is bad and these women can miss out on the fun connection they can get from sex I partly agree, but I also deeply respect women who choose to keep a low body count. From my own experiences, many highly promiscuous individuals — both men and women — often carry emotional baggage, unresolved trauma, or poor parental relationships. One woman I slept with through daygame openly admitted her sexual impulsiveness stemmed from her strained relationship with her father during her childhood- she was raised with her grandparents and thus had no father figure around this lead her to go on a huge cock searching rampage and made it impossible to start a proper relationship with her because she was so addicted to sex.

This is one of my criticisms of Sasha and other coaches like Liam McRae and James Marshall: they sometimes seem too dismissive of the emotional and psychological consequences sex can have on people. Sex is not meaningless for everyone, and pretending otherwise oversimplifies reality.

Over time, I came to realise that different women want different things, and that’s perfectly fine. Some women are conservative, religious, or cautious about sex, and there is nothing wrong with that. One of the hardest parts of daygame is accepting that you will never align with every woman’s worldview on sex and relationships. Many men on PUA forums obsess over rejection scenarios they cannot control — such as a girl being religious — instead of simply moving on and meeting new women.

Sasha also criticises the PUA industry itself, arguing that many coaches are essentially charlatans who have little real experience approaching women. On that point, I agree. Much of the industry is simply recycled marketing with little action. Look at Ice White for example he’s a dating coach who’s approached 0 girls in real life – something Sasha points to in this book a lot of people selling you coaching have in fact done 0 approaches themselves

Unfortunately, Sasha lacks the storytelling ability to make this a truly riveting book. He lacks the emotional depth of Nick Krauser in Balls Deep or James Marshall in A Natural History. He brushes over his traumatic childhood in just a few sentences and barely explores any of his interactions or relationships in meaningful detail. There are no detailed lay reports, and nearly half the book consists of testimonials praising Sasha, making the project feel more like a marketing tool than a genuine seduction journal.

A lot of the material also feels recycled from Sasha’s free convention speeches and YouTube content. Unlike books by Tom Torero, Nick Krauser, or James Marshall, which contain substantial original material, this often feels like transcribed 21 convention content content with only minor additions.

Sasha could have written extensively about his daygame experiences abroad in places like New York City, Miami, South America, Eastern Europe, and London, but very few stories are included I mean the stories themselves are literally only a quarter of one page. The overall result feels rushed and lethargic, especially with the constant testimonial pages interrupting the flow.

Sasha also writes in a surprisingly immature tone. While that may simply be his personality, I personally believe seduction, relationships, and sexuality are serious topics that deserve more maturity and nuance.

That said, Sasha does make some valuable points about burnout and the downsides of excessive pickup. Burnout is absolutely real. However, success in dating also requires persistence and volume. You need to approach many people, reflect on your experiences, and maintain your mental health throughout the process. It took me around eight months to achieve my first successful daygame result, along with countless awkward dates, flakes, and rejections. Dating women from very different cultural backgrounds forced me to confront weaknesses in myself that nightgame, online dating, and social circle game never revealed. Experience is invaluable so make sure you spend your precious life getting as much of it as you can.

At the same time, consistency matters. Most men quit because they cannot handle rejection or because their egos are too fragile. If you continue approaching consistently while maintaining self-awareness, progress usually comes eventually. I’d zoned out a lot in my daygame adventure – being too passive and not approaching enough at certain points i fell into a plateau which is normal but having the mental strength to break out of it is important to. If you’re a low smv individual relative to the people around you you’re going to have to approach a lot more than someone who’s high smv- pretty basic thinking but it’s the truth

Overall, Sasha falls short of providing the detailed storytelling and nuanced insight needed to elevate this book beyond a mid-tier self-help guide. The lack of situation-specific examples — something writers like Tom Torero and Nick Krauser excel at — leaves the reader wanting more.

If I had to recommend books to beginners, I would personally choose Nick Krauser, Liam McRae, or James Marshall over Sasha. In my opinion, Sasha lacks the maturity, balance, and depth needed to truly stand at the top of the genre.

That said, complete beginners will still gain useful insights from this book. The biggest disappointment is the lack of detailed field stories despite Sasha’s extensive experience travelling and doing daygame around the world.

Overall score: 5/10

To find out more about Sasha Daygame:
Alexander Lasarev YouTube Channel