Mindful Masculinity

The majority of dating coaches in the space advocate for moving to a country where your smv is higher – the age old saying of “go where you are treated best” Today I will be discussing reasons as to the potential consequences of doing this and situations where It might not work out. 

Disclaimer: I am not a dating coach nor am I selling any dating products or services this blog is really for recreational usage to reflect on my previous experiences in daygame and to share my insight. For those wondering I am based in London so for those who want to network in the future please email: darrenpua1@gmail.com thanks

Example – Thailand Passport Bros: 

There are literal YouTube channels that have interviews dedicated to those who met Thai wives abroad and had these said Thai wives divorce them and take  everything from them . There are even instances of said men committing suicide after a divorce.  If we see an interview with one of them below- 

This guy is clearly autistic, probably has Asperger’s – is a social recluse – its probably that women target these sort of men as a better looking one would potentially have options  .This man himself in this story picked up his Thai girlfriend from online dating using a classic Thai dating website. These sort of men are very vulnerable because its clear on the face of it that they have no experience with women and are unable to know when they are being taken for a ride. The result – an easy avenue for the woman to get a passport with said woman lying about abuse he allegedly face against said man in a proceeding court case- now this no doubt causes a huge mental drain on the guy and an example where some women who are into you may have ulterior motives. If theres ever a huge gap in sexual market value between two individuals – especially an obvious visual one like the example posted above there’s a potential that the one lower down in terms of socio-economic SMV could be taking advantage of the other – this is almost always the woman but there are examples of young men taking advantage of vulnerable women in the third world too – examples of this in places like Egypt where young Egyptian men marry and divorce old western women.

In the example above a Malay man recounts his experience being used for money in a relationship with a Thai woman. He also explains the socio-economic factors behind this with Thailand’s deterring economic situation and rising inequality being one of the main drivers. He also speaks about men being lonely in the West and being taken advantage of in marriages in the East. With Thai women well aware of what their love and affection can do to manipulate the man into parting with large amounts of cash.

Are these men lazy? Most definitely – they could easily stick it out and do a couple of 100 approaches in the UK and actually fight for a decent relationship – but most men take the easy way out or take the first option that reacts positively to them – in the case of this fat autistic guy it’s evident to anyone with a half decent level of experience with women that he was being used-  you don’t need to be an expert on relationship dynamics to figure that out but its clear his lack of experience with the opposite sex it’s just having him taken to the cleaners and a large percentage of men who go to Thailand to take advantage of their high smv end up in bad positions . Often it’s their inexperience that gets taken advantage of rather than anything else and usually the men who pick the Thai brides have a large amount of inexperience so much so they are willing to marry any half decent chick that comes their way. 

It’s not just inexperienced that get taken advantage of – in the Thai talk with dan podcast you do see some fairly decent smv men still be taken advantage of in relationships with women – the host who is a guy who left Manchester to move to Thailand before dating a Thai chick who tried to cut herself whenever he wanted to leave her. The result – the man was entrapped in the relationship and made to look like an abuser- again when theres too much difference in sexual market value you see the potential for one person to be taken advantage of in the relationship by the other and the person with “superior smv” ends up being entrapped in the relationship.

Modern Day Views on Thai Brides 

For all that’s said and done the modern interview on the  Thairsh times  YouTube channel are really interesting. For all the stick Rollo Tommasi gets in his “Rational Male Series”  They do paint a picture to prove Rollo’s theories are at least somewhat real in some circumstances – stories of Thai wives being manipulative , using weak low smv men for cash and the real examples of hypergamy on display within Thai culture. With Thailand having the divorce rate of some 80 percent it is estimated by the Malay  interviewee posted previously – the risks of dating and looking to establish a long term relationship are very real in Thailand and definitely have consequences at hand which people more often than not gloss over with romantic love or infatuation – the fact is 80 percent of passport bros in Thailand are likely to lose long term in LTRs should ring alarm bells.  Sometimes nihilism and negative apprehension in the short term can protect one from the very real consequences of divorce and shitty marriages in the long term. 

Korean Men and Vietnamese Brides 

Again in a similar way to the British men with Thai brides situation we have Vietnamese  brides moving up the sexual market place to marrying Korean men- these men are usually considered an after thought by Korean women – with the men blaming them for being too demanding or a modern day pua term- Hoeflation. Where the socio economics of a certain country or region mean the hoes become overly demanding for the value that they add from my experience this is more commonplace in London/Hong Kong/ Singapore / Korea and the US – in predominantly richer cities.

The end results of these bridal marriages were an equal or so divorce rate to that of regular couples in Korea which was interesting to see and the results were mixed with a portion of these weddings ending up in ok happy and for filled marriages , others were the girls just robbed the guys’ shit with some being the guy just abusing the girl. So the reactions from this documentary were ultimately mixed showing that in some cases a high sexual market difference didn’t always lead to the men getting f’ed over in a divorce with this documentary concluding the the fuck ups were actually equal to those of regular marriages. Again the men in this documentary entering these marriages seem more on the side of the autism – Aspergs with relatively lower SMV to regular men. 

American Tourists getting Killed in Colombia Whilst Using Tinder 

Once again passport bros show their inexperience in certain places and non more evident than here – with women inviting them out via dating apps like Tinder and spiking their drinks – this is prone to happening in any places but mainly in developing countries where bar girls work taking advantage of naive people . Whilst on tinder in Latvia in 2018 I was messaged on many an occasion by said bar girls on tinder –  a lot of these women wanted to meet me that night there and then which was too good to be true. No woman on online dating will make you her immediate priority and if she is she’s most probably a bar girl .  Have some respect for yourself and arrange a date a day or two later instead of immediately meeting up with these women and if it looks too good to be true it probably is. 

Source: https://www.bbc.com/news/world-latin-america-68022288

With this article I feel bad – but again a lack of experience in social dynamics and self awareness can often lead to men being exploited and taken advantage of . Dumb people/ Autistics/ Spergers  in general get taken advantage of with their lack of social awareness of being manipulated – indeed one of my Asperger’s friends got scammed in Ukraine by a bar girl in 2018 – he matched with her on tinder and met up with her that night on tinder at her location only to be hit with a £2000 bill at the end of the drinks- the lesson here if someone on tinder wants to meet you up then are there at their place immediately after matching them don’t do it. 

Tips for not being taken advantage of on Tinder: 

Most of this is common sense but ill write some of it here just incase for those of you that are new reading this: 

• Don’t agree to meet up the same night you match someone 
• Always make a location to a bar or coffee shop of your choice not hers – if she insists on her location its a sign she might be a bar girl 
• If you’re in latin america insist on a popular coffee shop in a mall – somewhere where you know you can’t get spiked – same thing for south east Asia – chose a competent location where you can’t get taken advantage of 
• Never send money to any girl ever- its the biggest red flag you’re being catfished. 
• Never send nudes to any girl ever- this could potentially lead to possible black mail cat fishing scams 

The old school Louis Theroux Thai Bride Documentary 

This documentary did the rounds in 2003 on the BBC showing what could best be described as low smv men going to Thailand and looking for love there- The drawback? A lot of these men again ended up getting divorced quickly and would marry extremely quickly- in this documentary sometimes after a day or two. One of the men in the documentary highlighted below is clearly a nutcase and that women seems to want to escape poverty in Thailand and would rather marry a nutcase than stay in Thailand which is kinda sad. All in all when men try and desperately fix their problems under illusions of marriage to seem like the problem is gone – the reality is the lack of game, the lack of self awareness of the opposite sex is still abundantly evident and when you don’t have those social skills there are no quick fixes. Marrying a person escaping  poverty doesn’t fix lack of game. 

Of course the man in this documentary had been through 2 divorces whether they were his fault or not remains to be seen but they most likely were as he displays pretty bad  retardation in this documentary. A life without learning social skills you can end up here being used as someone’s ticket to a passport or alone – men need to be proactive about their life problems at all costs.

My own family – potential passport bros being taken advantage of 

As I’ve written before on numerous  my own brother was a dumbass aspergy passport bro who got taken advantage of . He met a Russian woman online at age 20 and flew out to Russia and consequently married her – the reasons he did this were varied . Firstly he went to an all boys school from around the age of 13 to 18 and didn’t make many friends – he ended up socially isolated with no female companions whatsoever – so naturally the first woman who showed interest in him online which happened to be a female 3 from a remote part of Russia – he flew out and married.  

Again my brother has been on the Asperger’s spectrum his whole life which no doubt left him in a vulnerable position to be manipulated by any woman- had it not been this Russian woman it would’ve most likely been someone else. Said Russian woman then cheated on him with three other men during the course of the relationship even after he had kids she was still cheating on him. 

Ive written about his marriage on three separate occasions in this blog alone -maybe sounding like a broken record on this issue but once again I reiterate that it shows how men can get taken advantage of in dating and relationships. My brother seemingly had this romantic fantasy that if he rescued a woman from poverty then she would stay loyal to her- alas she didn’t and it proved to me no matter what you do for a woman loyalty is never guaranteed . She can always up sticks and leave at any moment and visa versa. 

I also note that a lot of men. Are permanently stuck in bad relationship situations due to the neurodevelopment or cognitive disorders- those on the Asperger’s spectrum will have to do a boatload more work developing social skills than those who aren’t for example.  Some can make it and I’ve seen autistic/aspergey people do well . Others will suffer however and continually be  cannon fodder for manipulative women- in the case of my brother he kept on marrying women from the third world and serving as an easy gateway to British citizenship for them as a result. 

Conclusions 

Most of this blog is common sense for the majority of people who read this blog who aren’t new to pickup artistry but I still see naive men making the same mistakes while gaming in the third world. Passport broing can feel great- the feeling of being accepted, lusted for and respected is something that every man wants but its important to be self aware when you’re being manipulated and taken advantage of. For all the criticism “PUA” gets it provides invaluable experience when done correctly that most men are lacking , the more social situations you put yourself in the better you will be equipped to face life’s challenges and not fall victim for such scams- some of which in extreme cases can prove fatal. Going to the third world to improve ones dating odd’s isn’t a bad idea it just needs to be done with discipline and caution which I believe a significant portion of western men don’t have.